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I Quit
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This entry was posted in coping, Coping skill, Working after loss and tagged Antidepressant, Depression, Mental Health, Pharmaceutical drug. Bookmark the permalink.
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Good for you Sunny, you come first. Working, pay-check, career…etc, is all great stuff but if you lose yourself in the process then what the F**k is the point?!
Withdrawal, well that is something I understand only TOO well. Not only from my illegal drugs and alcohol but after my suicide attempt I was on a lot of the same meds you were/are including Cymbalta..I know what you’re experiencing, it will all pass, just hang in there. I’m sure not having that going to work deadline reality hanging over your head will help a lot.
I am happy for you Sunny, I think you will now be able to get well now, the right way and for YOU.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and Chris my friend….Thom
Thank you Thom! Sorry I am SO late in replying, but I’ve been too sick to think. No doubt you can relate to the withdrawal process. Chemicals are chemicals…put them in your body long enough and there will be consequences when you stop. I’m still very much in the thick of it now, but am hopeful it will be behind me soon. Thanks as always for your kind words!
Good luck to you Sunny! I believe that once you get it all out of your system, you will feel much better. Once you lose yourself because of medication, it’s time to make a change. I have worked in an environment where we joked about all of the “rattling purses” because we all had to be on something to be able to deal with the stress of the job. It’s just not worth it. Your education is a great accomplishment and you should be proud of that. Having a particular degree doesn’t mean you have to stay in that field and be miserable. Give yourself a great big pat on the back!
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Thank you, Liza! You make a good point about my education. I hadnt thought of it like that. I’ve been fighting the freakouts about what Im going to do with myself once I feel better. Thanks for the reminder that I still have options. And sorry it’s taken me so long to reply. Conjuring lucid thoughts is still a process at this point…Still slow on the uptake
Good luck to you!
No job is worth your health. I’ve had to tell a number of friends that. Some of them almost didn’t realize that soon enough and are still healing their minds and bodies from the oh-so-real trauma of a toxic workplace.
Here’s hoping the withdrawal passes quickly and the you that’s been buried underneath it all sees the world with fantastically healed eyes.
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Thanks, Kier! I’m still very much in the thick of withdrawal, hence the sloooow response. You are right, no job is worth your health. It’s been scary but I’m hopeful that I will land on my feet soon. Thanks again for the kind words of encouragement!
Awww Pumpkin, I feel for you. And you know you’re doing the right thing. Every day is going to keep getting better and you’ll soon be back to your old self, stronger and better than ever.
I’m so proud of you.
Love,
Melissa
Thanks, my friend! It’s slow going, but I am having brief moments of clarity. Sorry I’ve taken eons to reply…As always, I appreciate your words! Glad to call you my friend
Oh Sunny, I am weaning off Zoloft right now and was about to try Cymbalta, but WHOA, maybe not.
I am proud of you and cheering you on from here!!!! HUGS
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I think my withdrawal has been particularly rough because it’s the first time that I havent replaced one med with another. My brain is expecting something new and improved to come in and make it go away. That’s the way I’ve done it in the past, but not this time. Cymbalta served it’s purpose. It got me through the last major bout of depression I had. If you are thinking it may help you, I’d still consider it. All meds are bad when it comes to withdrawal, but I still think they have a place in treatment. Best of luck to you too! Thanks for the hugs. Withdrawal has me moving along very slowly…been meaning to say thanks for a while now.
I love to hear things like this – people doing something that takes the utmost guts, in order to make their life a better place. Good for you! You deserve the life you have now and you are going to enjoy it. And meds were for your other life. Now you have replaced them with something better. I hope the brain zaps stop soon! Yay!
Thanks, Veg! The quivers and zaps are hanging in there…as are all of the other joyous symptoms. Slowly but surely though, I do get moments of clarity. Overall though, withdrawal blows. I hope your toe gets better soon too
I appreciate your words of encouragement. Thinking is a chore these days. Sorry it’s taken so long to give you a thanks.
Good luck with this new journey, Sunny. I’ve been wondering lately how I’ll know it’s time to stop taking my antidepressant (Zoloft). Or maybe I’ll need to take it forever. I just don’t know.
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Thanks, Ixy
For me, there was no doubt about it being time to stop. I think when that day comes, you’ll know it. When the cons begin to outweigh the pros it comes through loud and clear. Good luck to you! And I checked out your blog. I’m one of your newest fans.
Life is far too short to work at a job that doesn’t fulfil you. Congratulations on having the courage to make the needed changes.
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Thanks, Kara…I couldnt agree more! Widowhood has definitely taught me just how finite life is. It feels good to take control
Thank you Sunny. I have to stop taking sleeping pills now. Of course, I believe in Kara that Life is far too short to work at a job that doesn’t fulfil you. Good for you Sunny you have really the guts and courage to take some changes in your life.
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HI thanks for your blog! I wondered while reading your latest blog entry how long you were able to manage like this. I was in a similar situation with work even though I always tried to avoid any medication besides St. Johnsworth which buggers you up as well. Well I changed job within the company I work for and things are a lot better. But in the end you have to deal with what happened one way or the other meds don’t do it all!
Have a great day and good luck for your healing.
Good for you!! You are such a good writer..you should write full time…
I am in the process of giving up my regiment of energy sucking anti-depressent meds also. I have had the same heart issues as well as losing a gall bladder, developing bleeding ulcers, weight gain and a host of other ‘side effects’. Good luck to you:)
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It is really a good decision that you quit. A work that has a unhealthy effect on your body is just not worth it. I am glad that you are feeling much better. I hope you find something to do that you love and passionate about.
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You rock. Meds have their use, definitely, and probably helped you survive. But a toxic job can only be fixed one way. I have no doubt you’ll land on both feet in the middle of something new and awesome.
Hi Sunny, When I read about your, “Brain quivers” I thought, YEP. I know what she’s talking about. I hope your med-weening is going well. I have been on meds for several years and finally have a good 2-med cocktail that has enabled me to return to work full time. Life is too short to be miserable. Best of luck to you as you find your balance. I found you by searching for memoir blogs. I just launched my memoir blog as a companion to my gardening blog and was on the prowl for other like-minded writers. I’ll be back.
Sunny- It’s been too long since I’ve checked in on you. Hope the withdrawal has proved beneficial for you. i see you haven’t posted here in a while and I wonder if you’re OK. I hope so… I’ve been there, to one degree or another, I filled a Zoloft Rx recently and have been staring at the bottle. I keep thinking I should probably take a yoga class first–long term, I think it would be more effective.
Be well.
-j
You made the right decision. You have every reason to quit and your life will turn out much better. You’ll withdrawal will be over and you can find a job that will give you financial benefits as well as contentment.
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Remember that if going off medication doesn’t work out that is okay too. I went off my medication thinking I had “fixed myself”. Boy was I wrong. It’s okay to need medication. You haven’t posted in a long time and I am worried about you. I hope all is well and you were able to get off your medication successfully. If not remember we are here cheering you on no matter what. Please let us know you are okay!
Thank you for your comment, Maquel
I am okay! I went through a couple months of withdrawal hell before finally getting medical help with my symptoms. In the meantime, I also started my own business, which is doing well. I plan to write a post about how I’ve been doing, but I’m afraid I’ve had a long bout with writer’s block. I am genuinely grateful for your concern! Thank you!
Business!? Yay! That is awesome. Boo withdrawal hell but yay getting help with it. Are you feeling better? Can’t wait til you post again. Hope your block goes away soon:D Your welcome. You are an amazing woman and I just wanted to make sure you were okay. Glad things are looking up!
Good thing you decided to quit. Your job and way of life would have caused more damage if you continued with it. I am impressed with your patience and determination to stick with your job but often it is a good idea to quit when it is only causing you harm. I hope you are doing well and recovering from the many years of stress and depression. I hope you can visit me at derivative. Thank you for sharing.
You came up with a very good decision. i think this will make your life much better. Good luck to you.
You made the right decision to quit. We are here to support you. Good luck to you.
You’ve got a brave soul. Glad you were able to quit those meds. Since when did you quit taking them? I hope it goes through.
-Olivia